That time again!

(update on my lump after this post)

It is time for me to try to take the kids pictures with my little camera! One day I will maybe get a sweet one!!! I have to fix the lighting on some but I actually think it looks cool with the bright faces, it makes the kids eyes stand out!

Miss Belle Natalie's 2 year old pictures (she will be 2 November 9th)

What do I say about Belle? Maybe what she said to me this morning will do... she patted my face and said in a high voice, "Mommy I'm so proud of you... so proud!" hahah Belle I am so proud of you. You are learning so much. You can say most your ABC'S, you sing so many songs, you are hialrious and you laugh at yourself, you pretend you are Cash's mom sometimes, you are always getting in trouble but it doesn't last long cause you look at me and say "ohhhh I am sorry" while you cry, You can climb everything, you put on make up and you put mom's lip gloss up your nose!!! hahah we are working on that, You love people, you get really flirty if boys are around, you dance your little heart out whenever music is on, you are sassy!! Holy cow are you. I think you have already learned to talk back, you always feel bad so you say sorry, you are so gentle, you are just beautiful. You will only eat Mac n Cheese and juice!!! or a bagel and cream cheese. You are definately my daughter. I love you so much and I can't believe you are almost 2 years old! I love you!












CASH GARRETT 8 MONTH PICTURES!

This boy is getting so big so fast. He eats everything. Like we will be having dinner and he cries and cries (LOUD) until we give him some. haha he loves to play with toys. He gets really mad if Belle takes them. He cracks me up he is always trying to snuggle into my neck. He always wants to be held... which I can't so he like yells at me! He has the best personality and he laughs at everyone. He laughs so loud that I have to take him out if sacrament or something because he is laughing so loud. He sleeps all through the night. He loves outside... he wants to eat everything out there too. His favorite foods are: Bananas, ritz, graham crackers,anything meat gerber food, apples, and he loves apple juice.
Cash is not crawling yet... he just sits!! he tries to crawl but gets so frustrated he puts his head on the carpet and cries. He does like to cry if he can't have something! haha I think I am in trouble.He is the sweetest baby I have ever known!
Cash I love you!! You make me so excited to see you every morning and well always! Stop growing so fast. I love you Bud.

Shock!!!

I have heard my whole life.... GOOD THINGS COME TO THOSE WHO WAIT....

This morning I was deteremined to get help. So I called my insurance and asked them all these questions about who will cover me. I ended up telling them my whole story and they transferred me to the top lady that makes all the decisions. She was so helpful she told me that my doctors finally referred me to a specialist... the OSHU specialists...(OSHU is a university that has all the orthopedic specialists, I called them yesterday and told them everything and they said they would hold a conference to see if they would take my case or even take my insurance and for me not to even call till Monday... 6 days away, I called my doctor and asked them to refer me to OSHU and the lady that has been helping said she would but it may take a couple days to a couple of weeks).

The insurance lady said all that needed to happen was for her to approve the referral and then I could set up an appointment with OSHU. She said she would do it today so I would not have to wait any longer.

When I got off the phone with her I had a message, I listened to the message and it was Liz a lady from OSHU saying she had an appointment ready for me and to call back. I WAS SHOCKED!!!!! I called and I have an appointment set up for November 22, 2010 at 1:30pm. I know that is far away but there are other people in this world needing help or more help then me... so I am ok with that. Liz said she would put me at the top of the list if there is any cancellations she will get me in way sooner. She also told me I needed to get an MRI WHICH I was SO grateful for because she could help me get one, she was suprised my doctor hadn't already done that. Then she said she would call my doctor to get the MRI set up! So hopefully tomorrow I will have my MRI. And to top it off my insurance will cover everything!!!! WHAT AN AMAZING MIRACLE- last night I felt so down and ready to give up, because it seemed like no one was trying to help me and I was ready to walk into the emergency room and scream "HELLLLLPPP" What I didn't realise or see is Heavenly Father had this whole thing together.

Once again... if you don't think there is miracles Think again! If you don't think Heavenly Father answers prayers.... THINK AGAIN! If you don't think he is aware of each one of us... THINK AGAIN! I am so grateful... I can't even describe how happy and thankful I am.

I want to thank so many people for praying, fasting, singing to me (even in chinese... TANNA!!!), thinking of me, texts, constant advice on what I should do, and trying to make me laugh... you know who all of you are!!! THANK YOU and as my Dad says "EVERYTHING WILL BE JUST FINE!" I am just so blessed that Heavenly Father found someone to help this lump!

so the update.... NOTHING!

Doctors aren't seeming to know what is the matter with me. The have referred me to some specialist and they are deciding if the will take our insurance or not or even take my case... All I am hearing is... "This is something I have never seen before I don't think we can help... Call this other person"

I don't really know what to do... Monkey's Dad works in a hospital and he said I need a MRI and a biopsy. He said the doctors should have known that and I need to get one soon ... It seems the lump is getting bigger cause I have stretch marks around it. I will get answers tomorrow hopefully and get some help if it's the last thing I do. If I don't get help I will just go to the ER because it is starting to really bother me.

I am sorry to share all this but this is my journal and hopefully this will be an experience to remember and help me down the road when I need more faith. Thank you everyone for your many prayers and thoughts.

Everything will be ok!

Lump???

So this last couple months I have been on this no diary diet because of Cash's possible allergy to it and I have been trying to excersize just so I can get healthy or loose some of this baby fat... Anyway I have lost quite a bit and it started to worry me a little cause how much I was loosing in so short of time! Anyways time passes and I start noticing a lump on my upper thigh. And out of no where it gets HUGE... Like the size of a half softball. I make a doctors appointment this last friday to get it checked out...

(I have had 2 surgeries in the past on my hip and it hasn't worked too well... I have had pain in my hip that previous doctors said they could do nothing about.)

The doctor examines it and she gets a very weird look on her face. She tells me that it isn't scar tissue from my previous surgeries. She said it wasn't a tumor thankfully, she said it was hard like bone structure... So she sent me to the hospital to get x-rays.

The x-ray techs were funny- I asked them if I could see the x rays and the warned me that it didn't look normal. one of them said "Hey well at atleast your different!" hahah thanks! Anyways my hip did look strange. My hip sockets especially.(I am just so grateful I lost some weight cause I might not have ever known the lump was there... I feel like that was a blessing from Heavenly Father)

My doctor said the would study them and get back to me sometime on Monday to let me know what needs to happen.

It is monday at 2:48pm and no call...
I don't really know what to do with myself.
I have done all the laundry, cleaned my room, kitchen, bathroom, bedroom, and the kids are sleeping.
Monkey is at lab and I am blogging! haha Blogging for some reason helps me. I guess because it gives me a chance to write how I am feeling

I am feeling so anxious! For some reason I am not to nervous. My incredible family fasted for me yesterday and for Cash so just in case I need surgery and can't be here he will take a bottle. Which I am so excited to say he drank out of a sippy cup today. Which put my heart at ease. I am so grateful that I know Heavenly Father answers prayers and knows of each one of our needs. No matter how many people are in this world her heres us.

I have been thinking of possible outcomes that could happen:

1. nothing, they could just say theres nothing we can do like last time (which I pray does not happen, I hope this time I will finally be able to get better)

2. A little surgery to remove the lump... and I will only need a week to recovery and maybe no more pain.

3. a big surgery to fix my whole hip that will take a longer time to heal... which I hope does not happe

4. medicine that could help???? I don't know

5. I have no clue

Well I am probably just going to call to see whats going on...

Belle fits! haha oh boy!


So my lovely neighborhood is out of control!!! There has been cops twice at my complex since we have been here, yelling fights where I thought the cops should come, and my favorite hard rock concert out my window!!! I was laughing so hard and obviously Belle loved it too!


Belle loves her skateboard...

Belle's sleepover!

So Belle has acted a bit sad lately becuase Cash has needed a lot lately... So Monkey and I decided to have a special sleepover with Belle.
- we made sugar cookies which we had a blast.... and felt so sick from eating so much!
- we brought our bed out and jumped around and played for awhile
- we watched Sleepy Hallow
- and Belle stayed up till she couldn't take it anymore.
- in the morning we made muffins
- Then we packed up and went to Grammy and Gramps House. We watched conference and explored, and had awesome food... Thank You Chloris and Mark. We love you guys!






















Belle-
I love you girl. I hope this weekend and now on you always know how much your mommy and daddy and brother love you. You are the most sweet and loving little girl. Thank you for being such an amazing daughter. I love you and feel so beyond happy when I think of you or when I look at you. I love you Baby!

September Life! and the last of summer...

Septemeber has been such a wonderful month. I can't believe it is October already and it feels like summer. I have to say this is my favorite time of year... FALL I love the leaves turning colors, the breeze, the smells, pumpkins, just everyone is excited about everything it seems, corn mazes, family, treats (non-diary!!!), I just feel so different this time of year and I love it.

(it has been clear skies and like 80 degrees all week long just for FYI)




Park and treats... nothin better!





Horses are Belle's new favortie thing to go see... I'm not scared, right? Their nice!" she says. So we have been the the horses a couple times this month.




THE PARK = OUR LIFE! we love the park. What child doesn't?? We definatly love it when Monkey gets to come...





So we decided to try out the mall... and huge success! Belle and Cash found the rides and play place and we were there for like 2 hours just playing. It was fun and I will be going back a lot!!!! It was good I didn't bring money haa ha I wanted so many things!