Our big Scare...

(I am sharing this so I can always remember and I can keep everyone who wants updated.)
This last Thursday October 8, 2009 my doctor called and asked if I could go somewhere quiet where I could talk. I went into my room and she said, “well we got your blood work back … and you are positive for the disease called Edwards Disease which is also known has Trisomy 18. So the doctor told me not to worry cause she didn’t want me to freak out before I knew if our baby really had this disorder. She told me that I had to go to Boise to get a special ultrasound to check our baby. I tried not to cry on the phone but tears were just pouring down my face. I was just hoping that this disorder had nothing to do with death…which I found out a few minutes later that my worse nightmare might could totally happen.
I had no idea what this disease was so I looked it up on the internet and this is what I found… Trisomy 18 is a condition which is caused by a chromosomal defect. It occurs in about 1 out of every 3000 live births. The numbers increase significantly when early pregnancy losses are factored in that occur in the 2nd and 3rd trimesters of pregnancy. Unlike Down syndrome, which also is caused by a chromosomal defect, the developmental issues caused by Trisomy 18 are associated with medical complications that are more potentially life-threatening in the early months and years of life. 50% of babies who are carried to term will be stillborn, with baby boys having higher stillbirth rate than baby girls. At birth, intensive care admissions in Neonatal units are most common for infants with Trisomy 18. Again, baby boys will experience higher mortality rates in this neonatal period than baby girls, although those with higher birth weights do better across all categories. Some children will be able to be discharged from the hospital with home nursing support for their families. And although less than 10 percent survive to their first birthdays.
I honestly should not have read that cause I lost all control… Which I shouldn’t have, because I had no idea if my baby had it or not. So I freaked for a while and finally called my mom and told her. I decided that I needed to hear my moms voice. It helped a lot but after I spoke with her I was not able to speak to anyone. My wonderful family all called me minutes later and I couldn’t speak to anyone, all I could think about I that I might not have my little boy…. I couldn’t stay home because I was going crazy… so me and my denial I decided to go buy everything our baby needed when he was born. I bought pj’s, blankets, clothes, onesies, socks, etc. I am so grateful for Monkey he was crying because of the whole situation and completely freaked out cause I couldn’t control myself but he remind so patient and loving! I couldn’t have gotten through that night without him.
So we went to bed that night and I still couldn’t find peace… I fell asleep finally with the biggest headache. But woke up not crying as hard. The first thing that morning my doctor called again we were trying to set up an appointment to go to Boise. I told her I had to go to Utah on Sunday through Monday (Monkey had an interview with California’s Optometry school on Monday) and right away she called the office in Boise and got a doctor to go to Salt Lake Monday to do my appointment at 1:00pm. How blessed am I and relieved I was. But still I was scared out of my mind and to top it off Monkey wouldn’t be with me. My Mom called and told me that my dad and her were coming to Utah to be with me at my appointment. I can’t tell you how happy I felt when she told me that! Monkey’s family was just as wonderful they waned to go to Boise to be with us ad they wanted to buy us a hotel room so we could go somewhere to be alone. When they found out we were going to Utah they still offered to come down! What amazing families we have!
Later that day we decided that we needed to go to the Temple and our wonderful friends Jim and Vanessa watched Belle while we went. After our session Monkey asked me how I felt.. I felt just so uneasy and scared I just didn’t feel at peace. I knew that everything would be fine and I knew deep down that Heavenly Father knew what was going to happen and no matter what would happen everything would be ok. I knew!!! Heavenly Father knows! But for some reason I could not get the thoughts of possibly not having my baby boy! Like I was a complete wreck… I got home from the Temple and just laid on the couch and cried. I could not get control on myself. I asked Monkey for a blessing! I am so glad I did… what an amazing blessing. I won't go into it but it said what I needed to hear. Complete peace came over me and I feel so good. I am absolutely ok now. I just know my baby will be here! I am so grateful for the Priesthood. And I am even more grateful that Heavenly Father let us have the Priesthood! I am so ready for my appointment on Monday cause it will only be good news…. It would be so wonderful if everyone could keep us in there prayers this weekend!